Creating Family Rituals
For years, stockings have hung by our fireplace. First we had stockings for our children. As they grew up and some started families of their own we added stockings for our grandchildren. This year I decided that the mantel was just too small for so many stockings. I sent an email telling everyone I planned to only put up the stockings for the grandchildren.

Two of my three children laughed it off and pretended to be upset. The youngest (who is nearing 30) made a comment about getting rid of the stockings for the other two but keeping hers. I heard in that comment a little undercurrant of sadness that a family ritual was about to end.
Delicious Living Magazine (deliciouslivingmag.com) has an article about creating your own family rituals. They can be symbolic activities or just everyday routines shared by family or friends. According to research done by the American Psychological Asso., rituals and routines are linked with marital satisfaction,health,academic achievement and stronger family relationships.

The article also lists tips for creating your own rituals.
*Rituals don't have to be time consuming to be meaningful.
*The ritual shouldn't overshadow the spirit of the event.
*Include kids in the planning. (No matter how old!)
*Consult older family members about their childhood traditions and see if you can recreate them
*Adopt new holiday customs.

For more ideas check out Jennifer Trainer Thompson's book, The Joy of Family Traditions (Celestial Arts,2008) She offers more than 400 ideas for creating family rituals. Or check out joyoffamilytraditions.com

So our stocking tradition will continue --only in a smaller sense. My daughter will have to start her own traditions as she gets married and has her own family. Until then, I've decided to surprise her and keep her stocking up one more year. We'll ease her into giving up that one tradition! (We have other rituals that our family will continue.)